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Magill FFL: Wussy NFL Decision Holds up Championship

By Ken Magill

As a result of the wussiest decision in National Football League history, the results of the first Magill Report Fantasy Football League championship won’t be known until after tonight’s game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Minnesota Vikings.

The NFL postponed the game from Sunday night until tonight because of weather fears.

Vince Lombardi is turning in his grave.

I used to ridicule baseball because the sport’s athletes can play until they’re practically into their 70s and the games sometimes get called because of weather.

I have always been against domed stadiums. I had season tickets to Buffalo Bills games throughout the 90s when that team was good—yeah, yeah, they never won a Super Bowl. Shut up about that already—and we considered bad weather an asset.

The colder it got, the more it snowed, the louder we yelled.

“Football games never get called because of weather,” I always said.

No more. That point of pride is now sadly gone. Another victim of an overweening society that increasingly believes no one should ever experience any unpleasantness.

Message to Minnesota: Want to know why your dome collapsed? That was God saying you shouldn’t have built the damned thing in the first place.

Now, get out there and play, you wimps.

In any case, going into tonight’s game, e-Dialog’s e-D’s TDs has a solid lead over Harte-Hanks Heroes and looks to win the first Magill FFL championship unless Harte-Hanks can pull off a miracle.

e-Dialog is beating Harte-Hanks 142.46 to 101.72 and Harte-Hanks has only Philadelphia running back LeSean McCoy yet to play. In order to win, Harte-Hanks needs McCoy to score 41 points.

McCoy isn’t known for putting up those kinds of numbers, but hey, you never know.

Good luck!

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Terms: Feel free to be as big a jerk as you want, but don't attack anyone other than me personally. And don't criticize people or companies other than me anonymously. Got something crappy to say? Say it under your real name. Anonymous potshots and personal attacks aimed at me, however, are fine.

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Date: 2010-12-29 09:53:53
Subject: e-D's TDs WIN!

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